Entertainment
HumorBy Tipsy Nikki
8 months ago
I had my first dentist appointment in half a decade and I paid for the absence.
You see, I've had this lump on the side of my face for awhile. (I won't define "awhile"). It would swell periodically and the tooth in it's vicinity would become painful while chewing. I convinced myself that it would go away but Jay thought otherwise. He urged me to seek medical attention and only after seeing his genuine concern did I concede.
I took a long internal pep talk to get me to dial the number, but I finally called a dentist's office to make an appointment. I consoled my nerves by convincing myself that I wouldn't be able to get in any time soon anyway. I probably won't be able to get in until August, I thought. So when the sweet perky lady on the other end said "how about tomorrow at 10:30?" I was thrown. I hesitantly accepted the appointment. And that is when the butterflies started fluttering.
Jay went with me to offer support. Once in the car the fluttering increased two-fold. My heart was pounding and my mind was overwhelmed with paranoid thoughts. I began taking Lamaze-like breaths.
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EntertainmentHumorBy cheller
8 months ago
So yesterday I did something to my back. It hurts so bad, I went home and took a nap so my husband and I could go on our "date night" of dinner and a movie. Let me tell you how hard that is when you can't keep your head up. UGH!!!
I can't even describe how I have to sit......... I sit straight up but my chin is touching my chest and my neck is protruding in a sway sort of manner towards the front of the body. If you're in front of me and want me to look at you while youre talking I sort of have to look only with my eyes as my head can only turn sideways. I am sure a sight!!!
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Humanities & CulturePeopleBy cheller
8 months ago
 One of my favorite things to do is people watch. I love it! Trying to figure out why they are where they are. What they are going through, what they are doing. And sometimes I like to think I am correct in my thinking. Yesterday I know I was. And it almost brought me to tears.....
I am in the back of our church and two rows up this family of 3 come in and sit down mid worship. And by a family of three I simply mean an attractive mom, her 17ish daughter and her 10ish daughter. They are dressed up and very happy to be there. They looked as any family do while sitting in church. I am watching as this mom leans over repeatedly and kisses her daughters on the heads. (she is in the middle of them) and I am reminded how strong a mothers love for her children is as I do that to my son every chance I get.
Our pastor is talking on what it takes to have a real relationship with God. He is talking about how sin separates us and prevents us from having that true intimacy we all desire. He is talking about how God exists in the midst of people who are
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Humanities & CulturePeopleBy Numb Nuggets
9 months ago
Onto the Bus She Comes
Like most of my college mates who decided to live in the city rather than in our university's town village, I ride the bus to school quite often. I have to get up with the sun, walk a mile down the hill to the bus stop at the beach and hop on line number five for the first leg of my commute.
One gorgeous autumn morning, I take my seat on the bus and pull out my books to study. At each stop, I glance up to watch who gets on and off. At this time of day there is usually an assortment of elderly, the homeless, grammar school and high school ages kids and community college students.
At the bus stop across from a Kentucky Fried Chicken a young woman carrying a bouquet of carnations  steps quietly onto the bus. She is wearing black sweatpants, a new, blue jeans jacket and a pink blouse that looked like overdone cotton candy. Perched comfortably over her tightly braided black hair is a bright blue Dodgers baseball cap. |
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LifestyleLove & RelationshipsBy kaytiiangel
9 months ago
February 10, 1996 was the second worse day of my life. February 6th was the worst. I had to do what no parent should ever have to do. I buried my son.The day before, Hubby and I had to go to the florist to pick out flowers to lay across his casket. Not to Toys R Us to shop for a crib. Not to choose a stroller. Not to pick out a cute outfit. Not to become overwhelmed by the huge selection of colorful toys. We had to decide which type and color of flower we wanted at our son's funeral. It was much harder than I thought it would be because as I flipped through the book of arrangements I noticed they were all big-huge. They were all to lay across full-size caskets, the kind for adults who had lived much longer lives than my tiny Angel. With tears streaming down my cheeks I asked the woman if they had anything smaller. I barely got the words, "For a baby" out of my mouth. She told me they could make any arrangement smaller. We chose one with blue carnations and white daisies.
That night Hubby and I went out for a little while with his best friend to try to get away from the pain of the last few days and try not to think about the pain that was still to come. When we got back to my in-laws I got ready for bed. Instead of falling asleep with my precious son on my chest, I had ice packs to relieve the pain of my engorged breasts, full of the milk that was supposed to nourish my darling son.
The next morning I went through the motions of getting dressed, fixing my hair and doing my make up like a robot. I felt like my body was on autopilot, like my soul was removed. I remember arriving at the cemetery where my parents, sisters, brothers-in-law, Hubby's family, and a couple of our close friends waited. I couldn't look. I couldn't bear to see the tiny casket that held the baby I'd held four days earlier, the tiny Angel that died in my arms.I vaguely remember being led to a seat in front of several floral arrangements. In the middle were the flowers Hubby and I had chosen. I don't think the florist understood. Though the arrangement was beautiful, it swallowed the tiny casket underneath it.
I remember the pastor, from the church I grew up in, welcoming everyone. I know he told two stories and I wish so much that I could remember the one about a little girl and her doll. I should have written it down after the funeral but I never did. I know that I cried quiet tears throughout the entire ceremony. I stayed strong until Roy began talking about how we would never see Jacob grow up, how all of the dreams we had for him were lost. That's when my quiet tears turned into gut wrenching sobs. I knew what we had hoped for him was gone but hearing it out loud was too much for me to handle. I was only 23. I shouldn't have been sitting in a cemetery, burying my only son, my second baby, the tiny life I carried close to my heart for nine months.
After Hubby's great aunt's funeral on Tuesday, I walked over to Jacob's grave. My father-in-law walked by my side, his arm around me. He asked if I was okay. I shook my head and said, "I keep thinking it will get easier. That the pain will go away but it doesn't." Over thirteen years later that horrible, stabbing pain still pierces my heart. It's no longer every day, but when I remember, when I take the time to really remember, the pain is just as great as it was on that awful day.
Get up right now. Go hug and kiss your children. If you can't then call them to tell them you love them. Our children are on loan to us from God. They are placed in our care until they have completed the job He put them on Earth to do. Once they have completed their job, God brings them home. Jacob's job was to teach us to live each day to the fullest, to make the most out of our lives, to love each day as if it's our last. Jacob's job was completed in six hours and fourteen minutes. He did it wonderfully. I am proud to be his mommy and proud to have him as my Angel. |
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Humanities & CultureSpirituality and FaithBy cheller
9 months ago
Today I was pondering what to write. I take time in my day, a SPECIFIC time in my day usually to put in writing something I want to remember. Yes, I print my blog posts out and am keeping a scrap book. This is just sort of my living scrapbook for all to see and read.
Today though, I had been sitting back pondering what to write. Nothing wonderful has happened to me in the last 24 hours for me to report.
Let me start over. Last night I went to dinner with my father. As usual, we two can't be in the same room without fighting. It is rather sad really. Someone called me a drama queen this week for something I wrote about someone elses drama, and I was quick to rebuke that. I don't think of myself as the queen of drama myself, but for some reason am circled by people with drama in their lives that tend to very rapidly flow into my life. Causing their drama to become my own.
So I get home from dinner last night and am in bed by 8:30- which even for me is a bit early. I sat there and cried because of the relationship I share with my father. It is so tumultuous |
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LifestyleLove & RelationshipsBy kaytiiangel
9 months ago
 Continuation from Trisomy 18...the emotional side
February 5th, 1996. Hubby and I were on our way to Asheville to stay in a hotel near the hospital. There were several inches of snow on the ground and to no one's surprise an accident occurred. Luckily it wasn't us but we did stop so he could offer his help. Not long after we were on our way again. We had dinner at Shoney's with my parents and then went to bed. I awoke at 6 AM the next morning so I could curl my hair. I knew there would be a lot of pictures taken and it was important to me that I look as well as I could.
We got to the hospital a little while later and our doctor turned Jacob since he was breach. Immediately afterward they broke my water to prevent him from doing a summersault. Excess amniotic fluid is common with a trisomy pregnancy and despite their best efforts, the nurses couldn't avoid my socks getting wet. Good thing I brought another pair!
I was given pitocin |
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